♥ LoveLane LoveStory ♥

Hello sayang . It's 4am right now . And I'm not asleep . Not new to you I guess . I'm not gonna dwell on telling you what I did today . I just need you to know something . Every single time we fought , what do you really feel ? What was really going through your mind ? Did you feel like you wanted to win or did you feel like you just wanted it to stop ? OR did you feel like breaking up with me ? We fought a lot of times . Too much actually . And you got sick and tired of it . I know . You would just agree on breaking up with me than to run after me . I'm sick and tired too . Sick and tired of your LIES and CHEATS . That is why I keep on breaking up with you . But the real thing that is going trough my mind , you will never know . The clues are right there infront of you . It's too obvious . I love you .

Sayaaaaaaaaaang ! I just came back from Wild Wild Wet ! It was really SO fun ! I went there with my cousins , Fatin and Aqilah . Aqilah is so cute sey sayang ! I love seeing her having so much fun . I just wished that you were there too . You can have fun with us . I always imagine that you were there with me when I'm having fun . I will always picture you and I having fun in the pool , laughing . But all I have to do is wait 2 more months . Things may change . But leaving you is never my choice . I love you so much sayang . Too too much .

I BOUGHT A NEW iPOD TOUCH ! I HAVE TO SAY THAT ! Hehe (: I trade in my iPod touch 4 with iPod touch 5 !!! LAWAAAAAAAAAAAAA ! Hehe (: Suka sangat !!! Okay okay , I chill . Hehe (: Today I went to Jurong Point at BoonLay . Asyik daerah East side je , so I gi west and meet my cousin , Yaya . We walked around to find baju swimming for tomorrow . Then after that I balik rumah dia and lepak skejap . Lepas maghrib baru I dengan Nisa , adik Yaya , go to my house . I have sleepover at my house today ! So right now no one is asleep yet ! We all are playing The Sims after this . I know , you mesti kate I tak habis2 . WHATEVERRR . TATA ! MMUAH !

Hello sayang ! It's almost 12am now . I think I might be sleeping soon since I'm going to bank in the morning . Anyway sayang , my back is not better yet . It is still the same . I might be going to see doctor tomorrow . What's the cause of that sey ! Frustrating much ! Sayang , when school reopens the time will definitely go really fast . Sekelip mata , you will be out . I don't know why am I nervous right now . Thinking about you being release is making me really nervous . Anyway sayang , just now your mum messaged me and ask me for money . I don't have any money right now . My mum withdrawing it tomorrow . I feel so bad . But I told her I'm giving her this Saturday . She did not reply at all . Hmmm . . . Sayang , pernah dengar lagu Sama-sama suka by Radja ? Hehe , I tak habis2 dengan lagu Radja . But the song is about a guy and a girl who is in love with each other , but have to be separated and be with another person ...

Hello sayang ! It's 3:21am right now . Belum nak tidur lagi . Aaaaaaannnnnddd , I RECEIVED YOUR LETTER . LIKE FINALLY . Pfft ! And yah , you did not send to anyone else . The letter is the one that arrived late . Sorry for being so angry at you . Sorry . . . Sayang ,  if something bad happen to me , you know that you still need to move on right ? Takde jodoh sayang , nak uatpe kan . Da masanya pun . Sayang let me quote something you wrote . "Please beri I peluang yang terakhir untuk betul-betul berubah you . . I janji I akan berubah jadi seorang yang baik dan I takkan hampakan you lagi kali ini . . I betul-betul sayangkan you . . I ingin hidup bahagia dengan you seumur hidup I . ." Do you know that whatever you wrote there has been repeated thousands of times ? Handphone I baaaaanyak message you tu . Sekarang bila you masuk ni , boleh I percaya tu ? I really really want to believe that . Do you know that every single time that you said that , I believed...

SAYANG ! I have a major news ! A TERRIBLE MAJOR NEWS ! I HATE IT SOOO MUCH ! This morning I woke up and I found a lot of zits at my back !!! Zits = body pimple IT IS A LOT ! And it is FREAKING ME OUT ! And the odd thing about it is the zits shaped like my hair ! The "V" shape and all . It's as long as my hair !!! Below the length of my hair takde pape pun ! I mean the skin that doesn't touch my hair , it is COMPLETELY CLEAN ! It is GROSS ! It really is ! Should I cut my hair sayang ? I HATE SHORT HAIR . Will I even look good in short hair ? Sayang , HELP ME ! I LOVE MY HAIRRR !!! UWEKKKKK ! But if I really have to cut my hair , I'll CRY . Lama sey I simpan rambut ni . Okay , anyway today is Chrismas . My whole family at home . We all played Dance Central on Kinect . My parents semua joget so cute and funny of course ! Then Aqilah lose to my dad . Dia tak kasi my dad rest sampai die yang menang . So my dad bagi chance so that die boleh mena...

HARLO SAYANG ! (: I just came back from dinner at nex KFC . Since my atuk and nenek balik kampung , my mum tak masak . So asyik keluar makan je . Besok I'm going to kemas rumah and probably masak too . Alahaisss . I wanna say something , but I don't want to . I don't want you to get irritated by my thoughts . I guess I'll just keep it to myself then . My family now is calling me to play kinect . I might prbably type about what I am thinking tomorrow . Love you .

Hello sayang . Today my cousin tunang . I actually taknak ikot . Then my abang merajok dengan I . So I ikot . Hmph ! I see no point of following . Tak uat pape pun . Lagi2 sebelah bapak I . Urgh . After that straight to Nex Mall and buy electronic things . Sayang ! I'm trading in my iPod 4 to iPod 5 !!! YAY ! Nasib boleh trade in ! HOORAY ! Anyway sayang , talking about tunang and all . . . Kalau you , you nak tunang atau terus nikah ? I'm asking only tau . Kalau I kan , I terus nak nikah . I dengan you da nak masuk 6 tahun , uatpe nak ikat2 lagi kan ? Terus nikah pun best . Tapi kalau lelaki lain . . . EH MANA ADE KAAAAAAN ! HEHE ! A week left until my school starts . URGH . Love you sayang . # Time : 3:01am It's morning . I just finished watching a love series . And now I'm typing all this in my computer to write to you . You know what it is right ? You know what I'm going to talk about right ? Anything involving Love , I will always th...

Hello sayangkuuu . Today is Aqilah's graduation day ! She grow up so fast ! Few more days she is going to be Primary 1 ! My family and I went to her school for graduation . And as per usual , she's the tallest among all the children . After that we all went Geylang to eat . And when I reached home at 2pm , I was worn out ! I slept at almost 5am and woke up at 6 plus . Then straight out to Aqilah's graduation . Ngantok giler sey sayang ! So right now it is 3am . I woke up at 8pm just now . So I belum ngantok lagi . But I think I'm going to sleep soon . Sayang , I have a feeling that your letter got rejected . That is why I didn't receive your letter for a long time . Ape sey you tulis kat letter tu ? I really did not receive it . ): Miss you a lot sayang ! LOVE YOU .

Right now it is EXACTLY 4:06AM ! I TAK BOLEH TIDUR ! I pusing beribu2 kali pun tetap tak terlelap2 ! Sayang nga mimpi pasal I eh ? People say , "If you can't sleep it is probably because you are awake in someone else's dream ." Kenape ni I takle tidur ?! Padahal I satu hari keluar sey ! Should have followed Zaim for a midnight movie sey ! Oh , tadi bila I nga shopping , Zaim message I ajak gi tengok midnight movie . But then die paisey sebab tak manis ajak perempuan keluar malam2 buta . AND RIGHT NOW I CANNOT SLEEP AT ALL ! ISH ! OH MY GOD !!! RIGHT NOW BARU I REALISED !!! (4:11AM) TODAY IS OUR DAY SAYANG ! OUR 5 Years 4 Months . HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE ! Okay dah ! Hee (: Hais , I wish I could sleep now . Nanti nak gi Aqilah nye graduation lagi ! Night sayang . Eh , bukan . Morning sayang ! :D

SAYANG ! I SURVIVED THE APOCALYPSE ! And if you don't know what that means . . . I SURVIVIED THE END OF THE WORLD ! Hahahahaha ! Why I said that ? Well because some scientist predicted that today is hari kiamat . But us Islam clearly know that IT IS NOT . What fools ! Anyway , WE WENT SHOPPING TODAY ! All bought new Denizens jeans and new phone covers . And today is also my parents' 22nd Anniversary ! My brother and I belanja family at Seoul Garden . After that we went groceries shopping at NTUC . So now I'm back home . And I am so angry that Vampire Diaries and Glee next episode is on January ! I da la excited nak tengok dari tadi ! Alahaisss . I miss you sayang . I still don't know when I'm free to meet you . Hais . . . LOVE YOU .

Hello sayangku ! I just came back from a family outing . Well , unfortunately I went MBS without you today . We just went to the skypark today . The view was awesome . But I know you are afraid of heights , I don't think you would like to go . Haha ! I went there with my heels today . I JUST LOOOVE MY NEW HEELS ! It feels so nice to walk in it ! I'm going to buy more of it now . . . Hehe ! (: After that we all went Nex and eat at MadJack . I remembered our last dinner together at that place . Takpe , soon we can go again kay ? Hehe (: Tomorrow we might go shopping ! B/c my mum dapat bonus , so ape lagi ??? Ketok my mum la ! HEHE ! LOVE YOU !

Now is after midnight . HOLIDAY IS BORING ! I swear to god it is really boring ! I did nothing much today . Stayed home the WHOLE DAY ! Since I flunked one of my module , I was thinking of studying . At least something to do during my holiday . Taknak waste time je lah . I don't want to repeat a semester please . My father ajak keluar tomorrow to MBS . I told him I don't want to go MBS because I want to go there with you first . Then he jeling at me . HAHA ! But really , I want to go there with you first before anyone else . Or maybe some other place perhaps ??? See first kay ? I have a lot of things planned out . You are going to love it ! Love you !

I visited you today sayang . I was afraid that I would be late . I was wearing my heels to see you . Haha . Since sayang kat dalam , I boleh pakai heels lah . Nanti you da keluar , heels I berabuk kat dalam almari . Kenapelaaa you pendek . HAHAHA ! You were afraid when I told you that I have something to tell you . Why were you afraid ? I can see it in your eyes that you were afraid that it is going to be a bad news . But it is only about Azrai sayang . Someone whom I throw away a long time ago . I might have loved him once . But please trust me when I say you are the only one . After that you keep on asking me whether ade orang kacau I ke tak . You keep on asking whether I have any other guy . I don't have one sayang . I really don't . Please keep your mind calm and don't think about this . I taknak you pikir pasal benda yang tak akan terjadi . YOU BONCET . B . O . N . C . E . T ! ! ! You seriously are . HAHAHAHAHAHAHA . You have more meat than me no...

Hi sayangkuuu ! I just came back from meeting Zaim . He just wanted to meet me . He quarreled with his parents I think . I miss you a lot sayang . I'm seeing you in less than 12 hours . I'm wearing my heels tomorrow ! Hehe ! There are many things I want to tell you . Hope you won't be mad . Anyway sayang , I don't think I would send you anymore letters soon . Maybe I'll stop in the mid of January . You pun da nak keluar kan sayang ? I feel like I'm the only girl in the world who give you letters every week . You pun naik bosan agaknye . YOU NYE LETTER WHERE ? HMPH ! Bye . Love you .

HAPPY 67th MONTHSARY SAYANG ! It's not that happy without you around though . AND IT IS NOT THAT HAPPY WITHOUT GETTING YOUR LETTER . AT ALL ! I'm so angry . But fine , today it's our day . Imma let that slip . I did nothing today . I'm so bored . I swear my life is much much boring than you . URGH . I'm going to sleep now . I'm so sleepy . And right now it is only 8:30pm . Bye . I am so so bored .

Today is 300 days without you . Three HUNDRED days . Can you even believe that ? I went out and watch another Breaking Dawn movie . But this time with Aini , Hazirah and Ira . After that we all just lepak . And guess what ? I wore heels the whole time . Haha ! I might be crazy but I look nice in it . Hais sayang , I'm so tired going through the letterbox and see no letters from you . Had a feeling you send letter to someone else than me . Your friends eh ? Da la , bye . Oh , tomorrow . . .

IT IS THE END OF ATTACHMENT SAYANG ! Okay , before I forget , I want to tell you something . Just now your mum called me . She told me about the 3 hours visit in January . I was excited because it was schedule on 16 JANUARY . SIXTEEN . BUT ! No outsiders allowed . Only family . But it's alright right ? You'll be out soon sayang . It's okay kay sayang . We'll be in each other's arms soon . I will always love you sayang . I miss you a lot . Sayang , do you remember the time when you got to know about Ahn ? I don't want you to remember about it actually . But I need you to know this . I don't know whether I did talk about this before . And if I did , sorry for repeating it again and again . I'm sorry for hurting you . I know how hurt you were when you knew about that . Your heart sank greatly . You could just stare at the ceiling . Nothing you could do to change what had happened . I know you hated me for what I did . Do not lie . Y...

I got my grades for attachment today ! I got a B ! Okay lah tuu . The teacher said I would have gotten an A . Because I was given a good feedback from a patient . But I told her too late . But it's okay . Tomorrow is the last day ! And GOODBYE ATTACHMENT AND HELLO HOLIDAY ! Hehehehe . But nothing special about the holiday since it's so boring without you . And again , nothing to tell you . Sorry kalau letter I boring . :/ LOVE YOU .

Sayang , today is 12/12/12 . Hehehehe ! Luckily today my father fetch me . I can never go home alone ever again . The place where I need to change bus is so creepy ! Sayang , attachment week is so busy ! I'm so tired . Just 2 more days left ! I can do this ! Still waiting for your surat . I don't know what to write anymore . Nothing so fun is happening . Wish you were here , always .

I went home ALONE today ! ): My dad takle amek sebab hujaaan ! Seram sey sayang . Walking home alone like that , make me think about the days you fetch me . Kalau you ade , I takkan balik sorang2 macam tuh . But sometimes walking home alone makes me think a lot about you . Pernah tak sayang terpikir , both of us are from two different worlds . I'm innocent girl , you're a bad guy . I gi madrasah , you puasa pun susah . I stay home every day before I met you , you are a nightlife person . Nothing in similar . We are completely opposite . But many people say , "Opposite attracts" That makes two of us . We've wasted almost 5 years of our life quarreling . And if we were to quarrel again after you keluar , I frankly have NOTHING to say about that . Love you .

Sayangkuuu !!! Hehe (: Miss you so much ! Nothing much I did today . Today I afternoon shift . It was really relaxing . Haha ! Nothing much to do there anyway . Sayang , budak attachment I semua nampak gambar you . They saw it from wallpaper handphone I . And all of them say you are so handsome . Then one of them say that I am lucky because I pretty and you handsome . I smack her and say I'm not that pretty . Hahahaha ! I would say thank you , but I don't really think I am . Dengan braces I kat mulut ni die kate lawa ? Blind or what ? I da penat ah asyik check mailbox , surat you takde . Sudah ah . Hmph !

HELLO SAYAAAAAAAAAANG ! Today was boring . Stayed home all day . Except for urut . My dad send me to a Spa at Kovan . They massage my whole body . And it was AWESOME ! Crack sana , crack sini . BESSSSTTT ! Angin I semua keluar . Kat perut A LOT of angin they said . So now I feel so much better . Anyway , WHERE IS YOUR LETTER ?! I tak dapat letter you langsung pun . Kalau sayang bagi kawan sayang bilang je la . You ni . -.- Tu pun nak tipu ke ? Masih nak tipu2 I eh . Da la , I bad mood ah macam ni . Hmph ! Merajok dengan you ! Bye ! Still love you though .

Sayangku ! Just to let you know , I'm much better now . I went to Health Check up at SATA Bedok today . I went with my mum aje . She was so funny the whole time . We were like mother-daughter bonding at that place . Anyway sayang , this health check-up is free . It's only for those who were chosen . And after the check-up they give us $80 each just because we participate . Best kan ? Hehe . Finally I ade duit for my next week attachment . After the check up we meet my siblings all at Nex for lunch . My mum were in a very good mood and she blanja us . Haha . So right now I'm on my bed as usual , thinking about you . Believe it or not , I'm thinking about Jommink . Do not tersengeh2 kat situ eh . Hmph . Da da , jangan sampai termimpi2 pulak . HAHAHAHAHAHA ! LOVE YOUUU .

Sayang , today it's 8 December . I'm writing this now because yesterday I was TOO SICK . I woke up early in the morning to go for my dental appointment . After that I went home to rest before going for my afternoon shift . My throat was getting worst every minute . When I reach KK for my shift , my throat is really bad . You tahu kan kalau tekak da sakit confirm demam datang kan ? At 4:00pm , I felt SO cold . I was down with fever . Tapi I taknak balik sebab I taknak kene bayar balik on Saturday . Lagi2 "A" class . The aircon was blasting . I could almost die in there . I told the staff nurse , so I didn't touch the baby at all . I just did some light duty . I didn't eat much too . I was too weak . And at that time , I was thinking of you . You mesti marah I sebab I refuse to go home . You mesti marah I sebab I am stubborn . But 3 hours left till my shift end . So and endure everything . And alhamdulillah I made it ! My father hantar I bali...

I'm writing this in the afternoon . Because I don't want to forget what we talked about just now . Hehe (: Okay , let see . . . Oh , your mum talked about Hatim . FOR THE WHOLE , ALMOST , 15 MINUTES . It was a little frustrating for me . Is it obvious that my face was really down ? I was really thinking at that moment , "Why must she ask the same question 3 times ?!" Takpe , next visit is going to be only YOU and ME . SAYANG ! YOU NAK KENEKAN I BALIK KAN ?! Sebab haritu I told you that my friends said that you are handsome . So now you kenekan I balik by saying your friends said that I'm pretty . YAAAAAAAAA RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT ! Bilang diorang , THEY ARE BLIND . And I WASN'T BLUSHING OKAY ! HMPH ! You tak baik sey sayang ! YOU TAKUT THAT MY FEELINGS WOULD CHANGE ! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ! Tahu pun takut ! Dulu tak kesah langsung ! Sayang , all I know is when I'm with you , I will be that Afiqah you knew 5 years ago . I ...

Hello sayang ! I've been playing The Sims the WHOLE day after I reached home . I AM VISITING YOU TOMORROW ! It is the first visit , so I hope your mum will NOT be late again . So anyway sayang , today I was assigned to be in the Nursery . And if you don't know , it's the room where they put the babies . I have to bathe the baby early in the morning . Then I have to take care of them every minute . I paling suka one of the baby boy . He really has the look . He's a Filipino . I selalu nak jaga die . Hehe (: When I look at him , I imagine how Rayyan will be . Okay , fine , I know what you will think . You will think I pikir jauh kan ? Whatever lah . Check2 you pun nak . Okay , I nak uat assignment I sikit . CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOUUU ! Muah muah !

Hey sayangku ! I'm so tried . I asyik lepas sampai rumah terus tertidur . Asyik tertidur aje . Today was as per normal . There isn't much to do in an "A" class ward . Tomorrow I pagi lagi . Hais , penaaat . Tapi takpe , this attachment 2 minggu je . After that HOLIDAY ! Abang you pun akan keluar soon kan ? Bila die da keluar , you are going to come out soon . CAN'T WAIT ! Love you sayang *Sorry kalau recently I type sikit2 , I am really tired .

My clinical attachment starts TODAY ! And I was really excited for it because I'm posted to KK ! And moreover it is "A" CLASS WARD ! Yay AIRCON ! BUT then , everything just turn my expectations around . Aircon was TOO COLD ! And I was having cough , so I tak boleh jaga tempat Nursery pun . The babies are all SO CUTE ! But since it's "A" class ward , orang2 kat sana semua sombong . I mean the patients . The nurses are all great ! Just the patients . Baru first day da banyak complain . Anyway , I booked to visit you on the 6th ! It's this Thursday . Can't wait ! LOVE YOU .

I AM SO TIRED . I AM SOOOOOOO TIRED !!! I thought the Marathon would be really fun . BUT NO . Nothing much to do there ! I sleep as soon as I  reached home . I woke up at 9 just now . I was really so sleepy at the Marathon . I will never do that ever again . It is really not fun ! NOT FUN AT ALL . Sayang , I read our blog again before I sleep . I guess I am always angry at you is because I never let go of the past . I remembered you said that before . i don't know why I am always thinking about our past and your past . Sometimes I really do hate it . But sometimes I just want to cry to tell myself that our love is still there . I love you Hilman . Only you . No one else matters .

I am at Shan's house right now . We have a little sleep over before going to help at a Marathon . I'm the Medical Team for the Marathon . We have to assemble at 4am . My shift starts at 6am - 12pm . Hopefully I won't get sleepy . Anyway sayang , today I watched Breaking Dawn Part-2 AGAIN ! Hehe (: I went with Dalila and Ernie . KECOH GILA ! Hehe (: I just LOVE being with them . They are like so fun to be with . I bought NEW HEELS ! Hehe (: SUKAAA SANGAT ! Okay lah sayang , nak relax jap sebelum pergi . Love you .

Hey sayaaaaang ! I AM DONE WITH EXAM ! HOORAAAYYYY ! I went to Abang Hidir's birthday chalet today . It was really boring I tell you . I decided to leave early though . Malas ah nak layan kawan2 die semua . Merepek meraban ah diorang . You and your friends honestly are much cooler than them . Sayang , before going off to chalet , your mum called me and told me to some down to your house . It's about a letter they received . Hatim pinjam duit lagi . Dia belum bayar $500 . And they have to pay back by 7 days . Kenape dia takle bagi your mum hidup senang sikit ? Sedih I tengok your mum tau . We'll tell you everything on our next visit . Love you .

Hey sayang ! Can I not say too much today ? Haha ! Because my day was really BORING to the core ! I woke up today , did not study at all and play The Sims all day ! I just stop once or twice just to eat . Then I went back to playing The Sims again . Haha ! Ya allah ! Boringnye hidup aku . Hahahaha ! Kay dah ! I nak tidur . Besok LAST PAPERRR !!! YAYYY ! Tata ! Muahhh !

Hello sayang ! I woke up early today . But my bus wasn’t . So I was late for exam . But luckily I came 5 minutes late . I’m glad I was able to do my paper It wasn’t as easy as the first paper . But it was okay . I went straight home today . Nothing much I can do without you around anyway . My holiday mood is ON . Because my last paper should be easy . Gonna play TheSims now . As per usual . . . I know . Love you sayang .

I'm still studying like per usual sayang . What am I do to anyway ? Tomorrow is my 2nd paper . And next will be on Friday . And that will be my last paper before school holidays . Hais . . . Another school holiday without you around . Another boring holiday for me . My parents told me that my family and I will be going Indonesia . But I don't know whether I will be following or not . My school starts next year on 3rd of January . Sayang , with a blink of MY eyes , it will be January . I said my eyes because I will be busy for most of my days on December . I know it will be so slow for you since you have nothing much to do inside . Sayang , just for a little while . Just endure for a while . I'll be right here when you keluar , I promise . One day you will be counting down to your release date with only your 10 fingers . I will always love you sayang . I'll be going back to my studying . Love you .

Sayaaang . . . I'm taking a break from studying right now . I've been studying since 8pm . Right now it's 1:10am . Don't be angry okay sayang ? I know I've been sleeping late , but I need to . I have to pass my common test . I might be sleeping really late . Maybe at 5 ? Anyway sayang , GOOD NEWS , My paper just now was easy ! I manage to do each and every questions . My sleepless nights on the weekends really paid off ! Sayang , in EXACTLY 3 more months , I'll be in your arms again . I still remember when you were inside for the first 3 months . I was in attachment . I was crying too much . And then school starts . Things are still not good . But then slowly I make myself busy with a lot of things . And I was able to go on with my life without you . I am, stronger than I thought I was . I think I've been depending on you to do everything for me . And I didn't even thought of what if I do not have you one day . Since I'm more...

Oh my god sayang ! Today is my sister's concert ! Haha ! I did not know at all ! I thought it was next week . But don't worry I have all the videos for you . Haha ! She was so cute and PRETTY of course . There was this one play that she had to act . And she became the step mother of Cinderella . It was because she is tall . And she is too cute sey sayang ! SO CUTE ! Next year dia da Primary 1 . Time flies so fast sayang . Remember when we first started dating ? She was only 1 years old . And look how much she has grown ! If only time would fly faster right now and let you out now . Sayang , my parents are sending me for urut next week . My badan have too much angin . I'm getting rid of it all next week . I think that is why I've been very weak . Time to go back to studying . I miss you a lot sayang .

Hello sayang ! I would stop from studying just to write a letter for you ! So right now I am still studying . I'm like memorising loudly in my room Sayang , I really have a little confident for my paper . But I really hope that I can do it sayang . I need you right here with me when I'm studying . I have so much confident when you were around . Except when you disturbed me when I was studying by going under the table . Suke eh ? Remember my O'level ? I didn't think that I could pass because I got 19 for my N'level . And you were the only one there to make sure I'll pass . You are my good luck charm . And every single time before exam , you are going to tell me that I am able to do it . And that confidence made me really pass . But you are not here anymore . So all I have as my good luck charm is your necklace and bracelet . And it have been helping me for 3 examination periods . Hopefully I'm able to do the next one . I LOVE YOU .

Sayang , yesterday I tak tidur sampai 5 pagi . And it was totally worth it ! My teacher really love our presentation ! Sayang , I dont know whether this is stupid or what . But wearing your bracelet and necklace always gives me luck . If I weere to forget it , I would have a bad day . I need you to be with me . And if just wearing those would make me feel that way , I would . I'm going to continue to study now . It's 4:12am by the way . I have been studying since 12am . Sayang , wish me good luck for common test kay ? It's this coming Monday . I miss you .

Right now it's 3:51am sayang . I am struggling right with my presentation for tomorrow . Anywayyy . . . I'VE WATCHED BREAKING DAWN PART 2 ! OH MY GOD SAYANG ! IF YOU WERE TO WATCH IT , YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE IT TOO ! I'm going to watch it again soon . Hehe (: As usual sayang , whenever I watch a love story , I will always think of you . Watching Breaking Dawn makes me think a lot about you . Edward is too protective over Bella . But after knowing that Bella is able to protect herself , he let go a little . Sayang , I want you to be like Edward . I mean not literally . But just want you to not worry about me every time . You have been gone for 9 months now . And I'm still doing well . I am still staying strong , I am still leading my life as per normal , I still love you . But you have to know that if you see me like a different person when you are out , I'm sorry . I love you .

I RECEIVED YOUR LETTER TODAY SAYANG ! I was so hopeless last week . I was thinking that you used all the letters to send it to your friends . Sayang , you made me cry when you wrote this: "First very important and a compulsary thingy to do upon my released date, approach to my mum, seek for forgiveness and after that, approach to my sayang, hug her, kiss her and make her smile and stay happy always.. Anything for you sayang, once I'm out of here.. I promise.. Hold on to my promises.." Sayang , I really would love that . You were like that once upon a time . But you change . You know that right sayang . Sayang , I know you were too addicted to it . I know it myself but I convince myself every single day that you are telling me the truth . Even when I know that you were lying to me . Suka tipu eh ? Hmph ! Sayang , Aqilah miss you too sayang . She has been asking when will you be out . She keep on asking me sayang . She saw her name in the letter , then she...

It's 11:15 right now and I just reached school . Today's visit was the most happiest visit ever ! I cannot stop laughing . Why are we both so happy today ? Starting2 you da uat I ketawe pasal your shaving time . You semalam sampai ade feeling yang today I akan visit you . And you said every single time before I visit you , you mesti mimpi pasal I . You always ade firasat2 ni semua . Dulu bila dengan ex you semua , you ade rasa macam gini tak ? If not , is our love that strong ? Honestly sayang , I really did not wear any make up today . I did not even do much with my hair . I'm touched when you said : "I fall in love dengan you dari dulu . You pun macam gitu . Tetap I sayang you . You boleh kate I buta ke ape . But pada I you memang lawa." Thank you sayang . You made my day , Since you kate I lawa , I pun nak comment sikit ah tentang you jugak . YOU SUKE EH BILA I KATE KAWAN I SEMUA KATE YOU HANDSOME ! SUKE KAAAAAAAAAAAAN ?!!! Hmph ! And you told...

HELLO sayaaaaaaaaang ! Another week starting again . I have to wait for another 12 more weeks till you'll be out . I'm seing you in less than 12 hours . Your mum have not replied my message yet . So I don't know whether she is coming with me or not . Sayang , just now Amalina came over to my house for help with her work . We are now like before sayang . But I don't really think that I would be so close with her ever again . Maybe just as friends . I didn't do much today . So , I kinda don't know what to say anymore . Hee ! Hopefully tomorrow I will be able to see you . Hopefully your mum won't cancel . MISS YOU .

Fuyoh ! I just finished my 1400 words of essay that is due tomorrow . I started at 9:40 and finished at 12:30 . I am just AWESOME kan ? Hehehe (: Did I tell you that my cousins Yaya and Nisa sleepover at my house on Friday till today ? We had a lot of fun dancing and gossiping the whole day . Haha ! And guess what ?! Yaya installed ALL The Sims for me ! YAY ! So as you know me , I will be stuck to computer for a few days . Why letter sayang belum sampai ?!!!!!!!!!!! WHY ? I'm seeing you in 2 days or maybe 1 more day since right now is already Monday . But I still have not get your letter yet sayang . I miss you a lot . Aqilah still missing you sayang . She was still asking whether will you be out on her birthday . I said no . Then she was like , "Awww maaaaan . . ." Hahaha ! I miss you too much sayang ! LOVE YOU .

Sayaaaang ! Today I am CPR CERTIFIED . I don't really know what it is called . But it basically means I can do CPR to anyone . Hehehehehe ! I went for a test and practical test in school today . I'm the first to get certified ! I am so proud of myself . Hehehe . Sayaaang . I masih tunggu surat you . Mane eh sayang ? You tulis kat pompan lain ke ni ? I hari2 check mailbox . I nak dengar dari youuu . I miss you too much ! Hais . Anyway , after the test I went over to Shan's house for Deepavali . Rumah die is SO GORGEOUS . Hehe . I stayed there till 10+ and reached home at 12 . As per usual my dad bising2 . But it's okay . It shows he cares . Miss you a lot sayang !

SAYANGKUUU ! HAPPY 5 YEARS 6 MONTHS ! Nothing much happen today sayang . You know what sayang , I had a crazy thought this afternoon . I was thinking of going to East Coast Park . I know it is stupid kan ? Haha ! I was so tired and I was thinking of that . Tadi at school I watched all our videos . It brings back a lot of memories sayang . Remember our trip to Changi Village ? It was really so fun ! And remember you model at Esplanade Park ? I miss those times sayang . When you keluar , lets live like those days again . I miss our honeymoon days . The innocent love we had . I miss you a lot sayang .

Hello sayaaang . Today my school started at 4 and ended at 6 ! Only two hours of lesson in school ! Hehehehe ! Best tau ! I'm sorry about yesterday's post . I was crying so badly . Ignore that . Really . And guess what ? I PASSED MY PRACTICAL TEST ! Your luck for me still LIVES ! I was really cocked up during the test ! But I manage to pass ! Alhamdullah ! Sayang right now it is pass midnight . . . HAPPY 66th MONTHSARY SAYANG !!! Hehe . Love you ! Mmmuah !

The last 10 minutes I've been on the bed thinking of you . A million and one questions filled my mind . Why do you have to lie ? Why did I do to deserve this now ? Why must you always hurt me this bad ? After all you did to me , is your love even real ? How can I trust you that it is real this time ? How can I stop thinking about all this sayang ? How ? Tell me how sayang . Am I a fool to fall for you ? Do I look so stupid that you can cheat and lie to me all the time ? Why me ? Compare me and your exes , I'm the one that you hurt the most . Why ? I think you just ignore this . You are just so good at ignoring right ? Bye .

Happy Deepavali sayaaaaang ! Hehe (: Today is TGIF - Today Got Indian Festival ! Hehe (: Anyway , my cousins came over today . We played kinect all day . I was suppose to study for tomorrow's practical test . But they came , so I ape lagi , enjoy je ah . Hehe ! As usual , they all came to discuss about my cousin's wedding . But since tu semua orang tua nye hal , yang lain semua main game je ah . Bising satu rumah ! Atuk I join sekali ! Cute gilerrr sey Atuk I ! My uncles and aunties pun join joget2 . Hais . . . I miss the fun I had with you . One day , we will have the time of our lives ! But for now , all we can do it wait . I will always love you sayang . I will always wait for you .

Tomorrow is Deepavali ! IT'S HOLIDAY ! YAY ! But gonna stay home and study . Sayang , it got me thinking . Bila you belum masuk and you are still next to me everyday , I cheat on you not once , not twice but three times . I hurt you a lot of times . Too much that I myself can't count . But why when you are not here in my sight at all , I didn't even cheat on you ? I did not even think of cheating on you . I cannot even think of one time that I gatal dengan laki lain bila you kat dalam . Sayang , I want to be with you forever . Believe me , I want to . But (I really wish there isn't a "but") are you sure you can support me in the future ? When I was young , yes , all I think about is Love . All I need is your love . And when our love is perfect , all I need to know now whether are you up for an eternal love ? I'm 19 right now sayang . I want to study first before thinking about all of this . And I don't want you to think that I pentin...

Another week done and tomorrow is a new week starting . How are you sayang ? I'm much better now . But I'm still sleeping with pills . I can't sleep without taking my pills . Stayed home today . I read all the letters I given you . Sayang , I really cannot believe that it has been 9 months without you . 3 more months till you are out . And I don't know what I should do when you are out . Anyway sayang , my practical test is in 3 more days . I need your luck again . ): Hopefully I can pass without your luck . I miss you too much sayang . I'll be seeing you in a week time . I just wish I could see you once a week at least . I miss you sayang .

Sayang ! Today it is 10/11/12 . Hehe . Just telling you only . I miss you sayang . I just played kinect just now . I am so tired . I'm going to sleep soon I guess . Sayang , do you remember my letters that you asked me to keep ? I put them in a file . So every night , I'll just flip it open and read . Those are like my bedtime stories . My bedtime LOVEstories . It's much much more intesting than Twilight Saga . Hehe (: It feels like you are going out soon . But the nearer the date of your release , The slower the time gets . Please be fast . I need you back . Love you .

I should be sleeping by now . But I can't . Anyway , hello sayangkuuu ! I just took my medicine just now . So I'll be asleep in a few minutes . Maybe in an hour or so . I'm going to read through some stuffs now since I am unable to sleep . But after I write this letter of course . Sayang , I've been thinking about the day when you're out . I don't know how to react . I should be happy . But I know I'll be crying too . Hais , just thinking of you makes me cry so bad right now . Da 8 bulan you kat dalam , I nangis macam you baru masuk . Kadang I sendiri tak tahu kenape I tiba2 nangis . But I've been smiling a lot lately . And of course it's because of you too . I keep on imagining you surprising me at my doorstep . At the thought of that always makes me smile . My friends sampai kate I da gile . Haha ! I miss you too much sayang . I'm hopelessly devoted to you .

Hey sayang ! I don't know what I'm doing . I should just let my secondary school life just go away from me . But I keep on letting them in . I don't mind being with Aini or Ira but not Nazeefah or Hazirah . Actually Hazirah is okay , but not Nazeefah . What am I even doing ?! Please come back here sayang . I don't want them around . Why do I even bother talking to them in the first place ? Tomorrow there will be a huge test ! And I'm not even prepared yet . Kalau sayang ade , I always have the motivation to study . But sayang is just not here . I have to stay like this till you are out . Sayang , I love you .

Sayang , I didn't go school today . I'm too weak to go anywhere . But I have to get an MC . So I went to polyclinic . I have to check my heart too . I took an ECG to check my heart . It looks normal at first . But when I look at it again , there isn't any "P-wave" present . It is something I learn in my class . Something is wrong with my atria in my heart . The doctor referred me to cardiologist in Tan Tock Seng . Sayang , hopefully nothing serious is going to happen . I'm really scared . I don't wanna think about it . Dari dulu I told my parents to check at polyclinic , tapi tak pergi pun . Hopefully it is not too late . Sayang doakan I kay ? I love you sayang . I love you so much .

Sayang , now it is  2:55pm  . And I just reached home .  I should have listened to you just now when you told me to go home . You know me too well that I'm going to be sicker later . And see what happen i I didn't listen to you . SORRY . Just now I was too weak to even go home from school .  So I took taxi home . I am going to rest now . I'll write more when I wake up at night . I love you sayang . Sayang , I went to eat dinner with Abang Hidir just now . He belanje , so why not kan ? Haha . Daerah my house aje since he knows I'm sick . I'm sleeping soon . But before that I'm going to talk about today's visit . Sayang , I know you kat dalam risau pasal I . And I know you risau about our relationship too . But you need to trust me when I say I love you and only you . Don't be paranoid okay sayang ? Cinta I tetap akan untuk you . Insyallah sayang dapat kumpul duit untuk kahwin kay ? Lagi 3 more years eh ? Tak...

Hello sayangku !  I realised that in around 15 more weeks , I’ll be seeing you !  Can’t wait you feel you in my arms once again .  I’m very sick right now .  I’m down with a slight fever and a bad running nose .  Hopefully I’ll be fine by tomorrow because . . .  I’M SEEING YOU TOMORROW SAYANG !  Your mum just called me and say that she is not able to visit you .  So it will be ONLY you and meee !  Then after visiting you , I’ll be going straight to school . Sayang , 2012 is really a bad year for me .  And when you keluar ,  I really hope that I can forget about 2012 because I really suffers a lot sayang .  But it is also the year that I made a lot of friends  and discover more things that I can do which I didn’t know I could .  Furthermore knowing that you trust me and love me till the end  makes me stronger and never give up on everything . When you left for the first time in ...

Hello sayangkuuu ! Today as per usual it's family day . I'm lazy to talk about all that anyway . I'm seeing you in 2 more days . And in that 2 more days will be the day my brother go NS . Pelan2 kayoh ah die ! Haha ! I'm going to miss him ! Another guy in my life will be gone . But he'll be back in 2 weeks I think . Sayang , since you da tak kerja kat kitchen lagi , you uatpe ? Bangun , tidur , makan je ke ? Nanji badan macam gorilla how ? Hehe ! Tomorrow another week of school . Hais , this semester is really stressful sey sayang . I think I really need to concentrate in my work and really do it well . I think I will start doing it tomorrow . Sayang , I don't want you to worry about my heart okay sayang ? I taknak you kat dalam pikir2 bukan2 pasal I . Hopefully I akan sembuh kay sayang ? Insyallah . I'll try to sleep now . I miss you , Love you !

Hey sayang ! Right now I'm watching TV . I didn't go anywhere today . Bored at home . Sayang , just now I watched Vampire Diaries . I don't know why but whenever everytime I see Stefan and Elena love , I think of you . You were like that with me . And I miss everything that we did together . Sayang , sekarang da November . I suffered since February . And I left with 4 more months till I feel you one again . I think I wanna quit smoking now . So that when you keluar , none of us will smoke . You won't smoke again kan ? Love you sayang .

It's 2:47am right now . I just came back from lepaking with Aini, Ira and Hazirah . Reunion je sayaaang . But trust me sayang , I won't be like last time . I'm not stupid like last time . I won't let them step over me . Today I went to meet my ITE friends at ITE Simei . It was awkward coming in ITE . I don't really know why but it is just too awkward . Haha ! I just lepak dengan diorang first before going to meet my secondary school friends . Right now my heart is in pain again . I guess I eat my medicine now before I sleep . Love you sayang .

I didn't go to school today . I had MC because of yesterday . I was too scared to even leave my house . I'm afraid if anything happen to me outside , no one can help me . Sayang , I'm really scared . Doa2kan I selamat kay sayang ? Doa2kan I penyakit ni hilang kay ? I just took my medicine . It really makes me drowsy . That medicine makes me sleepy . I cannot just always rely on the medicine for me to sleep . I need to cure fast . I miss you sayang .

It's 3:10 right now and I need you to be here ! Why did you leave me like this ? Something is wrong with my heart right now . It's making me dizzy . It's making me breathless . My heart is very pain . When I'm about to sleep , it stopped again . My hands and feet are partially numb . If today is my last day , ya allah , please let me say goodbye to you at first . Please . I love you sayang . If I didn't survive this , I want you to know that I've been loving you even when you left . I love you Hilman .

Hello sayang ! Today at school I did a scenario with my class . We did kinda okaaay . Then as for my debate , I WON ! Hehe (: The long night trying to prepare for the debate is totally worth it ! After the debate , I have a class test . And Alhamdulillah I'm able to do it . Honestly sayang , today I felt lost . I reach rumah pukul 7 since sekolah habis pukul 6 . Then when I reach home , I took my wallet and all my important stuffs . Then I just went out . I don't know where to go but I just wanted to go out . I called everyone I know but they were all busy . So I just meet Abang Hidir . If you are here , I would have see you . I would have gone to your house instead . But what can I do sayang ? I need you but I'm unable to even see you . Hais . . . I love you .

It is going to be midnight soon . And I am so busy doing my school work . It is really driving me crazy ! Tomorrow I have a Debate presentation Nursing Lab scenario Nursing Sciences 4 test I am all packed right now ! I can't really talk much . I miss you of course . And OMG , Aini, Ira and Hazirah called me once again . They reuniting 4 of us this Friday without Nazeefah of course. Macam taknak datang je ah . Hahahahaha ! Kay lah sayang , I need to do my work . I love you , more than I ever would .

SAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG ! Hi . Let's talk about the visit just now . It feels like my everyday life like that . It's like I'm already used to visit you . Sayang , when I see you , I immediately knew something was wrong with you . Just waiting for the time to ask you that . You sabar kay sayang . I know you would react like that . I just want you to think , "Lagi 4 bulan je sayang ." When you started talking about marriage , I seriously wanted to laugh . You tiba2 je bilang I bila you keluar you taknak kahwin dulu . You nak cari duit dulu baru kahwin . I tak kate ape2 . Tiba2 je you bring that up . I'm sorry but right now I just cannot see myself marrying you yet . Sayang , you are getting more and more boncet . But I love what you did to you chest . It looks bigger now . Seram pulak I tengok you . Hehe . Sayang , I sometimes imagine that I don't know when you are coming out , then suddenly there is a doorbell . And when I open it , it...

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ! Today as per usual sayang , family day ! But as for today only for the ladies in the family . My mum , Fatin and I went to Nex to fetch Aqilah . Then after that buy groceries at NTUC . Lepas tu tak plan tak ape , my mum terus tiba2 queue kat Starhub . She asked about iPhone 5 terus in 30 minutes after blahblahblah , she now owned an iPhone 5 . Like WHAT ?! Sekarang she asking anyone who wants iPhone 4 dia . No one in the family wants it so we are giving it to my auntie . Kalau you ade , I terus da mintak untuk you . Hehehehehehe ! After that I meet my friend , Hurray . Yes that is what we call him . I meet him to do our project and then head home . We only met for less than an hour . I'm visiting you tomorrow ! YAY ! I'll be meeting you after my dental appointment . Hopefully I arrive on time . Love you sayang !

Sayaaaang ! Whatcha doin ? I satu hari kat rumah today . I need to do project for my teacher . Stress sey sayang ! She is asking a lot . I nak belajar semua pun susah . Anyway sayang , just now my dad told me my auntie nye abang meninggal this morning . Total , I know 4 deaths in a month . I'm scared sayang . Tanda2 ape ni ? Hais . . . I did nothing much today , so I can't talk that much . I miss you sayang . . . Meeting you in 2 more days ! Can't wait ! Love you !

Sayang ! Right now I'm playing Just Dance with all my cousins . Today is Hari Raya Haji . And what we did was dancing and play sports on XBOX . Hahaha ! My atuk pun join sekali ! Cute sey sayang . Sayang , in exactly 4 more months , you will be released . I takle percaye yang 8 months had passed . 8 months I suffered without you . Sayang , sopping has never be the same without you . I tak tahu kenape but I prefer shopping with you . I only trust your taste of fashion . I miss shopping with you sayang . I'll see you in 3 more days sayang ! Can't wait ! LOVE YOU ! Muah !

Sayangku ! I'm home now . Lepak with Zul and Zaim just now . Me and Zaim da okayyy ! Yayyy ! Sayang , just now I had a breakdown in school . It was just suddenly . I was remembering the time when you lied to me about selling the iPod . Then I was scolding you and maki2 you . But you just sat there and kept quiet because you know you were in the wrong . Why didn't you slap my face for using all those vulgarities at you ? Why didn't you scold me back when I was shouting at you ? That day was really the ultimate day that really makes me feel like breaking up with you . If I did , I won't feel the pain I'm having now . I really love you so much sayang . But if you masuk for the 2nd time . I don't want you anymore . I don't wanna feel this hurt anymore . It's too much . I love you sayang .

SAYAAAANG ! HELLO ! I have to stay awake for tonight until I finish everything ! I just got to know that I need to make a presentation by tomorrow . And right now NOTHING is done . And furthermore I have a HUGE test tomorrow ! I don't know what to do now . Hais . . . I guess I just finish my powerpoint first then proceed to studying . I think I should just wake up early tomorrow and do it in school . STRESS NYEEE ! Sayang , I really hope time will fly REALLY FAST . I really cannot wait for you to keluar . I have A LOT of plans for us sayang . Love you a lot ! A LOT ! Need to start my work right now . MUAH ! Love you !

I'm HOMEEEEE ! Hehe (: I visited you today ! :D We were late . I was really hoping to see you today . When I heard the officer said there is no slot , your mum and I were hoping she can slot us somewhere . Then the officer said if we really want to visit , we have only 15 minutes to visit . I was a little sad but I don't mind , At least I got to see you . I was so happy seeing you after SOOO LOOONG . . . You cannot even imagine how thrilled I was just now . Suka je eh tanye I whether ade budak2 handsome ke tak kat Cambodia . Not funny eh ! Tak pandang pun siape2 sey ! I tak pakai make-up pun kat sane . Sampai hati you kate gitu ! HMPH ! And sayang , stop saying I'm getting skinnier . Semua orang kate I macam lidi ! Da la ! I nak makan babs ah ! I'm eating more fats right now and balance it with exercise . You tu makin gemok ! Asyik makan tidur je kat dalam . Bila you keluar , you transfer fats you semua tu kat I la ! Hehe (: I saw your reaction when yo...

Hey sayang . I just got your letter just now . I was excited to read it . But nothing inside it is you . It is like you get it from a book or something . I wanna read what you are feeling , what you are thinking . I cannot even understand some part of it . Yeah , I'm proud seeing that you learn a lot of words . But at the same time , I just want to hear from the Hilman I once knew . I miss the Hilman that joke around with me every day . Where is he sayang ? I'm afraid you'll be a different guy when you are released . Anyway sayang , today is 22nd October . Happy 5 years 2 months for me . I'm craving for you . Especially today and you know why . I miss you a lot sayang . Love you !

Sayang , am I too nice ? Honestly , am I ? I'm not in good terms with Zaim right now . And I'm just giving up . I didn't even maki die or anything when he is the one who is in the wrong . All I did was cry . Then Azrai pulak keeps on finding for me whenever he has a problem with his lovelife . Then after that he just ignores me . What am I sayang ? What am I to them ? They are special to me and they do that to me . I don't know whether I can be happy right now . You are my only medicine . My ONLY one . I can't survive here without you anymore . I just can't . It is too difficult sayang . I need you here now . I've been crying alot . What should I do now sayang ? 4 more months . JUST 4 more months . I miss you alot sayang . I rindu you sangat sangat !

Sayang , can I don't write anything about today ? IT IS SO BORING ! It really is ! I stayed home the whole day . Played kinect and watched Ghost adventures in Youtube . Bila sayang nye surat nak sampai ni ? Tak sabar nak dengar dari you . I most probably would be visiting you on Tuesday . Wow , I am sacrificing A LOT for you I hope my teacher would understand me . I'm sorry sayang , I really have nothing much to say already . Hehe . I LOVE YOU STILL ! MMMMUAHHH !

Hello sayang ! Right now it's 19 October and I am officially pokai ! Haha ! And I have to wait for another 6 more days till my money masuk . Alahai . . . Should ask from abang if he have . Hehe (: Anyway , your mum has booked on the 23rd to see you . I don't know whether I can make it . If I don't go for the classes I would be kicked out from the module . I was thinking of telling my teacher about it . And I really hope she understands . And if on that day I tak datang , you takmo kecil hati kay sayang ? My love is still for you sayangku . I was supposed to go out with my girlfriends today . But I was too tired to go . Oh , and sayang . I REALLY REALLY HATE ZAIM . Hais . . . We quarrel again . Dia tak pernah ingat dia yang salah . And I will always be the one saying sorry . Kay la sayang , your ElenaSenorita nak watch VAMPIRE DIARIES ! Hehe (: Love you !

Hello sayang ! Before I say about anything , I need to tell you something . . . I don't love you anymore ! . . . HEHEHEHEHEHE !!! JOKING !!! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN EVER ! Okay okay , serious kay . I am planning to go to India for Nursing study trip for one month . But there is ONE HUGE PROBLEM . I'm going on 23rd March 2013 . And it will be one month after you keluar . Everyone is asking me to go . And I really don't know . Even my parents say go . HELP ME ! I want to spend time with you after you keluar . THIS IS REALLY FRUSTRATING . Urghhhh ! Tell me kay sayang ? Tell me whether I should go or not . Anyway sayang , today was a normal day in school . Nothing really much to talk about . I just miss you too much . It has been MORE THAN A MONTH since I last visited you . I'm craving for youuu ! Hehe (: Love you sayang ! Love you SO MUCH ! Muah !!!

Sayang ! Today I went to Nex to do a small shopping for school . I bought every single thing in PINK ! Hehe (: My earpiece that I bought 2 weeks after you went in da rosak ! So I bought a new one . PINK of course ! I LOVE IT ! Hehe (: Sayang , this morning when I was on my way to school , I chat with Shima . She's now my brother's ex . She told me that my brother has talked about us before . And my brother told her that he knows that we both can last . I never thought my brother would say that . But insyallah it will kay sayang ? Yesterday after I told my dad about why Abang Hidir's arwah abang bunuh diri , he suddenly said this : "Allah dah tentukan jodoh untuk semua orang . Walau macam mane pun orang mati2 nak kejar yang satu , jodoh tetap jodoh . You all cannot run from it ." I'm scared . And honestly I was thinking about you when he said that . Sayang , you pernah bilang I kalau I break up dengan you , you lebih rela tak hidup di dunia n...

HAPPY 65 MONTH-SARY BELOVED ! I have A LOT of things to say today . I'm feeling a little bit down right now . I just need to share with someone . I'll tell you everything that happened today . 1st : I woke up feeling nice about today . It is our special day , how can I not be happy about today right ? Then I took the same bus as Amalina , I waved at her happily . But she waved at me like , "Oh , hi ." So I didn't bother to even say anything else or even sit beside her . 2nd : Someone who I never considered her as friend was pissed off at us . It was just because we keep on talking about Cambodia . I was quite angry about it ah but I just forget about it . Let her be ! Jealous say jealous AH ! 3rd : Hakim and Zaim just not being like a bestfriend since I came back from Cambodia . They have been busy whenever I asked whether all of us could meet . Why so sudden so busy ? 4th : This was what that is making me so do...

I AM BACK TO SCHOOL TODAY ! Everyone was talking all about Cambodia . They cannot even stop talking and neither can I !!! For the first time I love going to school . We were all very happy to see each other in school . Haha ! The trip changed me . It really does . I never thought I get to be a happy person once again . But I am now . Sayang , 4 more hours left to our special day ! Are you doing your countdown too ? Hehe (: Love you sayang ! Muah !

Sayang . My heart is weak now . I feel like crying . I'm flying off to Cambodia in 9 more hours . I'm worried . I'm afraid something might happen . I need you to tell me that it is going to be alright . Dang it ! I'm crying already . I just wanted one last visit from you . But unfortunately I didn't able to get it . Sayang , if anything were to happen , WHICH I HOPE DOESN'T . I want you to know this . You are my life . You are my soul . You are my everything . I have never hate you . Even though you did this to me , I have never hate you . I just can't hate you . I can't be mad at you for so long right ? Sayang , thank you for all the sacrifices you made for me . You are the only one that understands what I'm going through every single day . Thank you for all the love you have given me . You care for me every single day . You were too worried when I'm sick . You love me too much and I love you too . Remember our happy days okay sayang...

Hello baby ! Hehe (: Ish tak suka ah panggil you baby ! Common sangat ah . I put tak suka . Haha ! I came home late today . Right now it's 1:23am and I baru balik . Hakim , Zaim and Zul jumpa I for the last time before I go to Cambodia . Sweet lah diorang . So we all lepak je la . Oh , and sayang , my hair is a lot more better now . But right now I regret buying Britney Spears Perfume . It's not nice . Bila kat kedai bau sedap . Tapi takpelah , next month dapat duit , I'm buying another Britney spears . Hehe (: So , sayaaang , I miss you ! I miss you so much ! September is nearly over sayang . Cepat jugak timing kan ? Just few more months sayang . Just few more months and you are out . Be with me 24 hours bila you keluar kay sayang ? I miss you too much ! Toooooooo MUCH ! I love you .

SAYAAAAANG ! CRITICAAAL !!! I permed my hair and my hair is ruined !!! I don't likeee !!! I'm going back to the hair salon and redo it ! Omg , I swear I hate my hair right now . T.T I guess I'm rebonding it tomorrow . Sayang , how are you my love ? I'm leaving Singapore in 3 more days . Hais , seramnyeee . I miss you sayang . I miss you too much . Sayang , I really have no mood to do anything right now . My hair is killing me . I'm sorry , but I'll write more tomorrow . The ugliness of my hair is really unbearable . Love you sayang .

EVERYWHERE IS ACHING ! ): Badan I seriously is aching almost everywhere . Today I went to school for dance practice for Cambodia concert . And I swear to got my body is aching . And the bad thing is , I have another rehearsal tomorrow . I gave up dancing a long time ago . And doing it one more time , I'm unable to do it again . I thought I can . But no , I thought WRONG . I need to wake up at 7 plus tomorrow . But I just couldn't sleep . I guess I just stay up then . Sayang , I never dance in front of you before eh ? I know you asked me before . But dancing for you is really very paisey . Dancing I malu but NYANYI I tak malu . Hehe (: I'm going Cambodia in 4 more days sayang . I'm excited to go but at the same time I'm scared . I worry something might happen over there . And I worry about you too . If anything happen to you inside , I won't be able to get back to Singapore in time . Sayang , I will take care of myself at Cambodia . And I ne...

Hello sayangku . I went out with Abang Hidir today . Had lunch and watch a fighting movie . I reached home at 11:30 . Sayang , I guess today's post is going to be a little bit long . Just now Abang Hidir talked to me . In a way he is trying to tell me what I didn't see happening between both of us . So here goes , First is going to be about Zaim and Hakim . Sayang , I know you are jealous about them . I know when I told you that I am hanging out with them , you bingit . I know you wish that I will not hang out with them again . Even if they have been my bestfriends for almost 9 years , I know you still wish I stop contacting them . You are just afraid to say all that because you are afraid to lose me . You are afraid to say no because you don't want us to fight . You said yes is because you trust me and you know that I love you and only you . And lastly , you said yes because you think they came in my life first before you . So you think you don't ha...