Day 213

I don't know what hits me today .
But I feel so emotional today .
I watched 2 love movies . After that I start thinking about you .
I locked myself in my room and cry and cry .
And then I realised that today it's 20th September - 7 months without you .

I did nothing today . Stayed at home as usual .
Tomorrow I might probably go to my friend's birthday party .

Sayang , have you ever think who is your first love ?
I mean the real real first love .
Okay stupid question . Don't answer that .
I don't know why , but when I think about it , you are my first love .
Even after 12 exes and 3 guys after you , you are still and forever my first love .

I need you to know something sayang .
Ahn , Azrai and Apiz are my mistake .
I shouldn't have hurt you . I shouldn't have cheated on you .
People say choose the guy that I cheated with .
Because if I love you so much I shouldn't cheat on you .
But sayang , every night whenever I on the phone with them , I just wish you would change .
I just wish you would tell me that I will be yours forever .
It is you I think about everytime I was with them .
So I believe you when you said that you were thinking about me when you took the drug .
I know how it feels .

I LOVE YOU SAYANG .
Trust me when I say that .