My Nega-thoughts

Like I said in the message ,

"I boleh maafkan seseorang. Tapi SUSAH nak lupakan"

SUSAH , bukan tak akan .

There is a different .

Below are the thoughts that I kept on thinking about .

You say : okay , you nk main game nih kan ? okay this time you do your own thing and i do my own thing okay ?
Me : I don't want !
You : Ape yang don't want ?! You nk prangai sngat kan ? Let see who can win this game .
Me : I don't want laaa !
You : Hey ! I don't give a damn ! Fuck you . (Then you hang up)

I don't bother to call you back .
I went to sleep and soon you called me back .

You : You besok tk jumpa I ?
Me : You yang prangai .
You : Nk jumpa tknk ?!
Me : You nk tknk ?
You : You ade sen tk besok ?
Me : Takde .
You : Kay byebye .

I was super hurt by you .

Do you know that this thing happens on Valentine's Day ?
And it wasn't even my fault .

You - You know what is the meaning of BOSAN?
Me - Ya ?
You - Kau tau tak yang kau tu BOSAN!

I just keep quiet .
I don't want to make things worst.
Then silence again .

You - Bobal uh !
Me - You bobal je la .
You - Ni luh kerja kau , kene sikit je tak nak bobal .
Me - Then you suka pe sakitkan hati orang kate macam tu !
You - It's the fact pe . Memang kau tu BORING . Kat phone tak bobal .
Me - Abey you nak ape ?
You - Kalau I nak you mesti tak nak pe .
Me - Ape benda ?
You - You tau la . Kalau I nak you tak nak pe kan ? Betul tak ?
Me - Break up ?
You - Uh . Kalau I nak , you nak ?
Me - Depends uh .
You - Ape yang depends ? Sekarang aku tanye kau , aku nak break up dengan kau . Amacam ?
Me - Kenape ?
You - Ehk ehk . Orang tanye jawab dulu uh . Takmo banyak kate ! Nak atau tak nak ?
Me - You nak break up pe . Means you da tak sayang I lagi pe . Uat ape I nak hegeh2 ?
You - Kate la ape2 you nak kate . Sekarang I nak break , comfrim eh ?

I kept quiet until you ask for the 3rd time.

me - Yela2 !
You - So kita ni kawan je kan sekarang ?
Me - Uhhh . . .

I slashed my wrist and start making weird noises.

You - You da knape ni ?
Me - Nanananana . . .
You - You !
Me - Hmhmhm . . .
You - You da knape ?!
Me - Takde pape la . . . Kenape you nk break?
You - I ade problem , kau takkan faham . And one of the problem tu kau !

Do you know how much it really killed me ?

The very most hurtful thing you ever said to me :

"Tengok kat mirror tu dulu then tell me whether eu ngn i suit tk.
SYIOK SENDIRI!
EHK KLAO MACAM GINI JE... KITER TKKN KAHWIN LUHS.
ADER HATI NK KAHWIN NGAN AKU KONON.
LUPAKAN JE LUHS!"

Why Hilman . Why ?!
What did I ever did to you ?

This was the thing I've been thinking about .