That quarrel .

After we celebrated his birthday. No thank you .
After we lepak @ his house . Still no thank you .
And after we are bored sitting around his house ,
we went down and sit @ our usual place . Again , not even a thank you .

He was in his typical bad mood whenever he thinks about money and life .
I just don't like it .
But I can't say anything because I know its been troubling him since .
I don't mind him saying about money or his life .
But what he said that night made me mad .

Him: Tak pernah seumur hidup I, bila birthday I, I pokai rabak. Birthday pun boring . Hidup da memang boring . Takde duit . . . Kerja macam sial . . . Yang case ni pun sama ! Birthday I dulu . . . . . . . . .
BLA BLA BLA !

I was quiet the whole time .
In my head, I was thinking that i bought the cake
and tried to celebrate with him but not even hearing a thankyou from him,
this was what i get ?
Complain complain complain !
What the hell !

When I took the bus, I messaged him .

Me: I'm your worst girlfriend , I know . I'm not angry . I tried to make your birthday something . Not even a Thank You from you . All you did was complain . You don't appreciate it . I thought there won't be any quarrel between us anymore .It is YOU who need time in this relationship , not me . I did everything today and i thought you at least be happy about it . Well , maybe your ex make it much much more better . I'm sorry I'm not that best . I'm sorry I can't make your birthday the way you wanted . I''m sorry for everything . Why do you have to say like that in the end ? I don't want to hear that you are sorry . I am the one that should be sorry for giving you a LOUSY birthday . Sorry if you don't like it . I'll try to do better next time . I'm sorry . What I did on your birthday really suck and boring . But I really thought it's fun . I've never seen you celebrated your birthday with cakes . So I bought it for you . But then , it waas a boring day for you . Maybe you have a much better birthday with your ex . Sorry that I can't beat your ex . I'm really sorry . You have to think properly , do you need time ?

In the middle of writing that , he called me .

I reject all his calls .

: I really appreciate it, you . I'm happy . Angkat my calls please .

: I won't reply you anything . You need time . You know it . No reply after this .

: Angkat please you . Kita tak gaduh . Kenape you gini ? I tak cakap you worst girlfriend pun . I takde niat gitu pun . Cuma I pikiran macam ane nak contact you . I belum ade duit you .

: Please . Takmo uat I gini . I need you .

: You , takmo uat I gini please . I stress . Please you .

: Kalau you sayang I please angkat . Please .

: I'm fine . I'm alright . Don't worry . I do love you , always .

: Please , I beg you like a dog . Please . PLEASE .

: Don't worry about me . Besok you kerja . Gi tidur .

: Please . PLEASE . I takkan kerja kalau you tak angkat . Please .

: I love you . I always do . You need time to think . Goodnight sayang . Go to sleep okay . Nanti besok you penat . Don't worry about me . I'm not angry . Love you so much !

: Please . You , please ! Kasi I peluang . I need you . I taknak masa . Please .

: Go to sleep ! I'm alright !

: I tak pernah dapat cake dari satu pompan seumur hidup I .

: Da la you . Gi tidur . Soon you akan dapat jugak jam Adidas you nak . Gi tidur la . Don't worry .

: I lose everything in my life . Terima kasih you . Ini malam I akan uat sesuatu . I akan uat diri I masuk penjara seumur hidup . I takde siapa2 lagi . I sayang you . Tapi orang yang I sayang takkan maafkan I . I sedih you .

: You kalau SAYANG I , takmo uat kerja bodoh . Bukan you sorang tau boleh uat . Just go to sleep . Please you . I'm not angry .

: I nak you . Please you . I taknak ape2 . Please angkat . Please . Favour you . Please !

He left exactly 86 miss callsduring the middle of our messages .

Finally I called him .
He was crying .
I don't exactly remembered what we talked about .
But he blaming me back for everything .
He said that I'm crazy for money .

Never in my life when I am with him ever think that !
He hung up on me without saying goodbye .
Like as if it is my fault .
I wanted to called him back and just screamed @ him .
But I don't want to make things worst .
So I just message him .

: I HAVE NEVER EVER THINK ABOUT HARTA DENGAN YOU ! SUMPAH DEMI ALLAH ! YOU DON'T KNOW HOW YOU SAID JUST NOW REALLY HURT ME . I don't need your reply, if you don't want to . Goodnight .

He called . But I ignored .

He called so many times and then I finally answer .

We are still not in good condition at all .

I hung up , take out the wire from my telephone and then offed my handphone .

I had enough shouting from him .

So the next day , while going to school - late , I message him .

: If you think I will forever be someone that makes you stress all the time , I can leave you now . And don't worry , I'll be perfectly alright . I'll lock and make you a prisoner in my heart . You will never be given to leave my heart . But if you have to leave me , I can't do anything more . You're still a prisoner in my heart . I love you alot . And when after a long time you already leave me , if I found out that you are dead , I'll kill myself . Or if you already have a new lover , I'll be happy for you . I love you forever and ever till eternity .

: We have nothing to quarrel anymore . I'm really tired of this . You are right . Do whatever you want . If you think it's good for you , go ahead and do it . I won't stop you from saying or doing anything . I won't be angry about anything ever again .

He called me after this .

: Kenape you ? I takkan tinggalkan you la . I'm sorry pasal semalam kay ?

: Mmm .

: You nak tinggalkan I eh ?

: Tak .

: Abey kenape message macam gitu ? I takkan cari pompan lain la . You yang paling last . I sayang you la .

: I sayang you too .

: Nari jumpa I tak ?

: Jumpa .

: Jumpa tau .

: Mmm .

: I love you .

: I Love you too .

Everything's alright .