♥ LoveLane LoveStory ♥

Thinking (Really thinking) Okay , I cannot breathe ! My heart are compressing ! (Sound so weird) # After 8 minutes thinking You are getting on my nerves ! Or maybe I am getting on your nerves . I try to believe whatever sweet thing you said . But everytime I did , the next day it looks like you are lying . Another thing is you always pretend to forget whatever major thing you said to me . Example : The night before : I want to marry you bla bla bla . The day after : I did not even think of marriage bla bla bla . I do not understand you at all . And now you will forever be in my mind . Trust me , you cannot be forgotten ! Because you are ON me .

Like people say , when there's love there's sacrifice . Your bills is 180 bucks ! I swear I do not know where to find that amount of money . I want to help you EVERYTIME . But some of them I just couldn't . How can I find 180 bucks when I am not working at all ? I just wish I can help you . But I do not think I can . My family is going bankrupt sooner or later . If I am rich , I would help you in any way . But even if I am not , I will still help you . I need time finding that amount of money . I am feeling so bad when I know that I cannot help you at all . I love you Hilman .

Today's lessons mostly are 2 periods except Literature . So I have no mood to go to school . I called Him and he is still outside ! I told him I wanted to skip school . This is what he said : "You, takmo uh . Pergi sekolah je la . Kenapa tk nak gi sekolah ?" I said : "Malas ." I replied on A WORD , he said : "You come on la you , gi sekolah kay ? Think about your future la . I nak you ade future . Your future is my future jugak tau . You tahu I sekarang da tak ade future kan ? Kalau you ade future at least something . Kalau I dengan you tak ade future macam mana ? Don't worry la you , I tak akan buat ape2 kat sini . I tak ade pompan lain . Pergi sekolah please you ." You , let me tell you this . I don't think that is true . You gave me a clue that you want something from me . And yeah , you need some money from me . You became so so good today just because of that . You never change Hilman . I guess the part you say you want to marry me is just...

You , Everytime I think this : ::Are we compatible ? ::Are we suppose to be together ? ::Do you love me ? ::Will we be together till death ? ::Will we ever break up ? But I suppose the answer from you is all the positive . I need you the most Hilman . Only you . My life will never complete without you , Hilman . I never thought we could be together this long . I just wished you could see me whenever I think about you . Even if my tears reach the ground . It would be happy tear mostly because it have been a while we last quarreled . Please do not hurt me . Hidup Mati Hilman Afiqah .

Today report sick . I was having a bad flu till my nose was like a clown's nose . At school I was SO SO happy despite the flu . Why ? HILMAN WANTS TO MARRY ME ! # The phone went silent . Then out of the sudden he said, "You, will you marry me ?" I was like , "What ?! You da gila ?!" Then he said , "But seriously , do you want to marry me ?" I was young to think about this but he is already 21 . Me : I do . Him : Why me ? Me : Because I already love you a lot ! Him : But why you sayang I ? Banyak soalan pulak budak ni ! Me : You are different . I know you . Even if you jahat I -- Him : You ada serious gini dengan ex you ? Me : No . (I know you pena .) Him : Okay you dengar eh . I want you to know this . *Silence . Until I call him . Him : If you tak percaye tuh you nye pasal la . But in my MARRIAGE LIST , you are the FIRST ! Me : Owh , Okayyy (OH MY FUCKING GOD !) Him : You better treasure it . Me : Then if I am the first , there must be second third f...

I am letting some of you go . I let you have the freedom that you want . I want to trust and believe EVERY SINGLE thing you tell me . I don't want to have a broken heart . I don't want to know that you are lying . Even if you are keeping a girl or two , I don't want to know . It is your life , what for I control your life ? The main thing is I love you . And I always will .

I am not going to ever tell you this until it is the right time to . : : : I Love You alot . But listen , Sometimes I feel like breaking up with you . I just want to see what will you do without me . I just wish one day you could change just for me and come back to me . I accept whatever you are . I accept EVERYTHING you are now . So what are you trying to show me with all kinds of attitude you giving me ? This is what I plan . I will break us up and see for a week . If you ever thought of having a new girl , I am going ASAP ! This is how much I love you Hilman . URGH ! WHY CANNOT YOU SEE IT ! WHY ARE YOU STILL TORTURING ME ? I NEED TO UNDERSTAND YOUR FEELINGS ! URGH !

I swear , with all my heart , you will be mine forever ! I am sorry for hurting you . I know it is already too much chances . Promise , I won't do it again . READ ! # I decided to study with Hilman . So I brought my laptop to finish up my F&N coursework . And that was a very VERY bad idea of bringing laptop . He wanted to see his photos . So I show him . Then he took the mouse and look at my photos . I don't expect him to click on this one folder 'eMo.X.iQah' . It contains MSN chats with ALOT of guys . And I was SO SO really SCARED ! I pushed away his hand and close every windows . I told him that folder is a secret . He is so curious and asked me alot of times . After 30 mins of doing my F&N , he got my mouse and he hold me tightly . I cannot do anything . But luckily I got to delete Azrai's and Ahn's chat . He get to read some other guys chats . He promise not to get angry . But when he saw the first chat , he was bloody pissed off . I told him not to ...